He Said CrossFit Was "For Girls"—Then This Happened!

The dude had long flowing blond hair like David Lee Roth in the Van Halen Jump video.

He was wearing baggy sweatpants.  His fluorescent orange tank top was visible from space.  He had the tan.  It was Canada in February.  

Who is this guy?



One of my ladies brought her boyfriend to class for show and tell.

He's a bodybuilder. He’s been teasing her and said, "CrossFit is for girls."

Luckily for him, he's in a class with eight women.  I get him to sign the waiver and we get to work.

After the warm up we tackle shoulder presses.  My strongest ladies are push pressing 95 for 5.  He’s tossing around 135 with relative ease.  

Next up?

The WOD that day was super simple. 

One-minute max calorie assault bike. 

We had 4 bikes so we had to do two heats. Schwarzenegger is in the first heat and his girlfriend is talking smack.  "Oh, you're going down, buddy. The loser does the dishes!”

“Bet!” he roared. 

His confidence was stronger than his Axe body spray.

I told him, "You should be careful. Don't go too fast." 

ATHLETES STAND BY.  3…2…1…GO!

He just starts ripping. He's a big boy. He told me he could bench 315 for 15.

His Assault Bike sounds like a Nutrabullet.

At about 40 seconds you can see he's turning colors. His back and face are going from pink to scarlet to purple.  He’s wheezing like an old vacuum cleaner.  

TIME!

Dude bro gets off the bike.  The computer says 53 cals. 

He takes 4 steps like Bambi, and then hits the deck face down.  My 8 ladies collectively suck the air out of the room.

"Oh shit, he's dead for sure."

Dude Bro is writhing and moaning on the Astroturf, bits of green sticking to his face and back.  

His girlfriend helped him to the benches and he napped there for 20 minutes. She had to go get the bucket out of the ladies' room and put it near his head.

And he kept saying, "I'm poisoned. I got food poisoning."

Never saw him again. 

He never came back to the class that was only for girls.



“Coach Just Tell Me What To Eat!”

She had tears in her eyes. Heather was 42.  A mother. A wife.  And nearly 70 pounds overweight.




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